Why me!

So this is my first blog and I am writing this not to cry or complain, but to maybe help someone who might be either in my shoes or feeling the way I feel sometimes.



Now I know people say that the Lord will never give you more that what you can handle. Sometimes, I believe this statement to be true. Other times, I believe I am just cursed.



My family got hit hard by the economic crisis and we lost pretty much everything. Just when we felt we were getting back on our feet I got hurt at work. When the lumbar sprain pain didn't go away they decided to do an MRI and in that MRI they found a Tarlov Cyst. A rare Cyst Disease that can cause some severe pain. Well lucky me my cyst is so big that they classified it as a Giant Sacral Meningeal Diverticula. Basically a really big Tarlov Cyst. The problem with the Cyst is that doctor are not very educated so they assume that this cyst do not cause pain. Oh but they do!!!!



My pain is mainly in my lower back, hips, and legs. I get muscle spasms in my shoulders, I have numbness and weakness in my legs, my bones feel like they are going to fall off, and my newest symptom is these weird feeling headaches. A neurosurgeon in Kansas City wants to do surgery but it cost $35,000 not to mention cost for travel and hotel stay for three weeks. Let me read off some of the high risks involved with surgery: Loss of function in the legs, bowels, bladder, sexual organs, and/or nerve damage.



Now a year into all of this and I still do not have any health insurance except for workers compensation, I am on my second appeal threw SSI (which I will probably get after I die), I really do not have any family/friends that can help me, I have seen several different doctors in my area, my doctors do not believe my pain is real, I have a lawyers who says that they don't personally talk to workers comp clients, My grades in school are now suffering, My pain are getting worse everyday, and My children are suffering. I can not sit, stand, walk, play with my children, go to a movie, or even wash my own damn dishes!! Oh ya not to mention I feel like I am in Hell.



Any Suggestions!